some disturbed?

That’s the question Kaushal asks me this morning before leaving to teach his yoga class. His house, where I’m staying, is under construction. After days of waiting the mason finally arrived, followed by the bull powered cart bearing a huge load of bricks. Even though I live here now, it’s still a thrill to walk out my front door and see something out of National Geographic. Less entertaining though is the looks the mason’s workers are giving me. I’ve already become very friendly and comfortable with the cabinetmakers. They’ve been here a few weeks and I’m helping with kitchen design. The head cabinetmaker is quite delighted to be considering new aesthetic issues and he now gives me a big smile, saying very good design (his only English) as he brings me cup after cup of chai. But the mason workers are another story. They’re quiet in that smoldering way and there’s one with that particular Indian male stare I loathe giving me yet another opportunity to practice self-remembering and not be bothered. Nonetheless, I’ve shut myself in the bedroom, unable even to bathe as this morning also began with no power and no water.

But truly I’m finding that nothing is much of a problem these days. My old habits and difficulties are just no longer plaguing me. Some anxiety arose and I lay down on the old folded blanket on the marble floor where I daily practice yoga and meditation (I’ve yet to see a yoga mat in these circles) and I lay in shivasana, corpse pose, until my heart’s rhythm started to slow. Then I slowly began my yoga routine, starting with the Himalayan joint opening exercises, but focusing on my breath and the relaxing of the internal body. Full concentration is not only required, but I now understand that only with full concentration are big gains possible. In my life in America, I somehow came to believe that full concentration, full participation, was outside my ability, available only in a rare moment here and there. Though at least I tried. Here it’s happening. And in all honesty, I’m not quite sure why or how, but I am doggedly and devotedly taking advantage of this opportunity. Speaking of which, back to it. I broke from my practice to jot down a couple of things for the blog, but while in the past I would’ve gotten lost in the computer, now my dusty blanket is calling, Marcie, your work is here. As they say here – I go.